Hey! That Apple Has A Worm In It!

Babies are like 'LOL Catz'. . . And this one is saying; "NomNomNom"

GIST #33 of 365

1) Oliver has finally found his thumb and can take over some casual part time human pacifier hours for me!

2) The nice Christmas-y must of the 7 foot live Christmas tree Das Piper brought home last week.

3) Pakoras

4) My blue ukulele

5) That I have been able to hold my tongue about the presents I got people this year despite my excitement. . . I usually break down and tell everyone long before Christmas.

A Post by Oliver;

This is what it would look like if I was a girl. . .

This is also what it looks like when my mom forgets to pack a spare set of clothes and I decide to explosively poop all over myself in the middle of our moms group, and the only other baby still in size 0-3 month clothes is a little girl.

Thank you Ann and Mary!

-Oliver.

Anne Geddes is Sick in the Head

The Canadian Baby Photographers were nice enough to send me a photographer today for a free sitting. And of coarse I was like, hells yes you can put my baby with totally humiliating little outfits and props and take pictures because it’ll be adorable and he’s too little to do anything about it.

Last night I was nervous about it. The woman on the phone had given me a run down of how the session would go, that there would be several ‘Anne Geddes-esc’ shots in only his diaper, and then a few snapshots in an outfit of my choice, and that I didn’t have to clean or worry because no part of my home would be seen in the final product. But that didn’t stop me from desperately running around the apartment with a confused baby in one arm and a duster in the other. Not to mention of coarse that even when it’s clean, having strangers come into my home is kind of really awkward and slightly stressful for me.

Don, the photographer was really great though, and put me at ease about the whole thing right away. That is, until he sat my wobbly little bobble head on a platform 3 feet off the ground and then LET HIM GO SO THAT HE STARTED FALLING BACKWARDS!

I always wondered how they got those tiny little month or two old babies to sit up straight for photos. I had always just kind of assumed that they were propped up by their mother’s unseen hands or held up with strings or something. I had even considered that maybe Anne Geddes had been secretly drugging her little models to get them to happily take those positions.

Nope! It’s worse than that actually! The trick, apparently, is to hold them in the position you want then take your hands away, snap the picture, then catch them again before they fall. I am convinced that this information has been deliberately concealed from the general public so that when we become parents we will actually agree to the whole production.

In the end though, once my heart started beating again. The results were absolutely adorable, and well worth it. After all, Don assured me, he’d been doing this for nearly 40 years, and he’s never dropped a baby.Or so he says, it's not like he would ge around bragging about it if he had.

GIST #32 of 365

1) Finding little notes of love for me in Oliver's little pockets. I think he may have had some help from daddy.

2) Oliver likes to lick everything. . . It sounds gross I know, and it actually really is. . . But it's wicked cute at the same time.

3) The hoarfrost on the trees today is breathtakingly beautiful.

4) Now that he's discovered playing. Oliver is less insistent on nursing constantly and more interested in going to daddy for more that 10 minutes.

5) That I am finished all of my Christmas shopping. Except that I haven;t found a stocking that I like for Oliver yet. . . It's an important decision, we're stuck with it for life after all.

Oliver's First Snow

Well, it's Oliver's first snow that will actually stay with us.


He doesn't look too happy about it.

GIST#31 of 365

1) Big fluffy snow falling silently outside my window last night.

2) I am done my Christmas shopping!

3) Watching Oliver's eyes bug out at a new toy.

4) The clusterf*ck of cow licks on the back of Oliver's m akes his hair stick up like Alfalfa.

5)BK veggie burgers.