8.23.2007

shout out to nannies!

I have a confession to make.

it's not one that is easy to make, but i feel as though i have come to a place in my life where i have the confidence that my true friends will stay with me even after the general public scorns me.

i am a tabloid reader.

not that i actually spend money on said tabloids. No, it's far worse than that. I am one of those horrible people who hold up the line at the corner store reading the latest news about Brangelina's small army of children, Paris Hilton's latest jail break, and just how fat Rosie O'Donnell is now. i do this at about 3pm, downtown, while people are trying to buy a candy bar, eat it, have a cigarette and bolt back to work within the time constraints of a fifteen minute coffee break.

but now that i have that out of the way i can talk about what's really been on my mind.

my immense respect and admiration for the nannies of Hollywood. today's tabloid press brought it to my attention that i am on the wrong career path.
It seams that Britney spear's former nanny has landed a multimillion dollar book deal to put her name on a book ghost written my some autobiographer-to-the-stars about her time in the K-fed/B-spe household.

WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT FIRST!!!!!

this is the American dream at it's best, not only does Britney get to fulfill the part where she doesn't raise her own children, but the (compared to Britney) underpaid baby wrangler later gets to fulfill the part where they get to earn millions of dollars for doing little to no work.

god bless America man.

so in an effort to bring this phenomenon to America's under-appreciated ice cube full of natural resources to the north, here is my new and improved five year plan. . .

find somebody to ghost write a tell all book about the Anderson's down the street, who i babysat for in high school . . . which should really only take a week or so. and then spend the next five years trying to make them famous. . .

a little turned around but after this blog entry i don't see myself getting hired as a nanny by the Mulroney's. . . (even though Ben still clearly needs one.)

3 comments:

wench said...

LMAO - Ben's problem is that he still HAS one!

i think i would rather be brangelina's gardener. i know the difference between shrubberies & weed and i'd love to live wherever they have houses.

i think it's a bit more of a 5 second dream.

I read the trash once in a while - but so what - other people read the leader post.

Abigail Road said...

I must admit, I sure like to sit down with a trashy magazine once in awhile.

i am the diva said...

my friend and i call them "shitters" cuz that's where she reads them - and they're full of shit. lol.

Ben Mulroney should be sent on the next shuttle off this planet.