5.31.2009

Pregnant Woman Are Smug



I have really mixed feelings about the song. . . it's funny sure, and I laughed at things that have come out of my own mouth in the last 24 weeks.

It also brought up some very frustrated feelings I have towards a large group of people that I would have called friends up until this last Christmas. A group I partied with, marched in protest and in celebration with. A group that I once identified with.

I think that it's unfair to make woman feel guilty about their giving you the answers you want to hear because. . . as was pointed out. . . you ask to be polite but you don't actually care.

Of coarse I am going to tell you that vomiting 3 times a day for 3 and a half months was totally worth it and not a problem for me at all. . . If I were to tell you that I hated every moment of it I would receive looks of accusation. . . as though I didn't love my child as much as I should just because vomiting is unpleasant. If not that then you would think I was just whining and complaining to get attention.

Of coarse I am going to take a tiny jab at the triviality of your life when hurtful words like 'breeder' are being thrown around, and I've been taken off of the party invite list because I can't possibly be an Ani Difranco loving feminist and a mother at the same time. And when the news about these new changes in my life were met with looks of pity and hesitant half hearted congratulations, I felt forced to downplay my very close and fulfilling relationship with the father of my child so as not to bring further looks and eye rolls from the room. If that isn't trivial and meaningless, then I don't know what is.

I am over the moon happy about the changes in my life. . . And I think that it is hurtful and petty that there were people in my life who couldn't get over themselves and the stereotypes that they claim to hate and yet fulfil with every breath in order to be happy for a friend.

1 comment:

Schmutzie said...

I've been hurt by similar treatment, and it's pure and utter crap. It says more about the insecurity/immaturity of the people behaving that way than it does about you. YOU are swimming in a good life filled with love and new life. I kind of want to kick them in the shins.